Tragic End To A Young Life
By
on
April 17th, 2008
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I've had a great week with the kids but unfortunately the week ended tragically and made my own issues seem painfully irrelevant. I'm not exaggerating when saying the whole country is in chock over the murder of Engla, a 10-year old girl with her whole life in front of her. She was biking home alone when a middle aged man killed her. It may sound lame to have a whole country upset and crushed by a single murder but that's the priority we have on kids here. It's also how safe our society is. One murder of a child is a lot and thankfully only happens a few times a year.
Many have been moved by this terrible tragedy but I've also seen parents react in a mature, logical, and refreshing way. Last week, the case of Lenora caused discussion around the world. You might remember, her 9-year wanted to get home by himself so she left him at Bloomingdales. Alone. In New York City. Overprotective parents called it child abuse but many applauded her parenting style.
When something tragic happens, the normal reaction is to become panicked by irrational fear. One might have thought parents in Sweden would panic and not let their children out alone any longer. I'm so happy to see parents reacting the opposite way. Realizing this is an unbelievably tragic bu rare situation which is impossible to avoid when letting children live a free and fun life. I'm sure parents are giving their kids an extra hug but still let them bike home alone at an early age.
Swedish kids are early on given lots of trust to help them make logical and rational decisions. Other cultures and countries, like Latins and Americans, call this this irresponsibly and crazy. Child abuse is often mentioned and so is prison time. How dare we leave our kids alone for a single minute! All this complaints because we empower our children while their young
If our way of raising kids was so dangerous one might expect our children to be injured, killed, kidnapped, and raped often. It's an interesting fact that our crime rates are some of the lowest in the whole world despite all this freedom and "dangerous parental behavior". That should be a powerful wake up call for all parents who shelter and protect their kids from everyday life in some kind of bubble.
We can't protect our kids from everything. It would not be fun and it's not even possible. Our children are capable of a lot more than we think. Given them the chance to prove this while they're young might be one of the greatest life lessons a parent can provide. Don't miss this opportunity.
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This is so sad. I can’t imagine what the family must be going through.
How we raise our children depends on how we have been raised. I was born and raised in New Delhi, India for a good 32yrs and New Delhi is definitely not a safe city but we did walk home alone from our school bus stop but always in a group. Leave aside the crime the traffic is terrible in India. I lost my nephew (he was 14yrs old) beocz some crazy truck driver hit his bike from the back when he was coming home from school. I have had some bad incidents in my family becoz of which we do end up being more careful with our kids.
Now living in the US for 5 yrs i don’t let my son out of my sight ever. If he is playing in the backyard i have to be able to see him or hear him otherwise i worry. I don’t know how i will be as he gets older..i guess i will cross the bridge when i get there
I don’t think it’s lame at all for a whole country to be upset over a child’s murder. All children should be safe and should not have to live in fear. Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to let Suzi out of my sight. Children are killed almost every day in the U.S. and it’s gotten so bad that people hardly notice it on the news. There has been “gang activity” in some of our schools (and if you could see this area you would see why this makes no sense; we are rural). Guns are sold to pretty much anyone and everyone who is of age, and people are shot for no reason. How are the gun laws in Sweden? Several days ago was the one-year anniversary of the Virginia Tech massacre, where a student shot and killed 32 students and professors and then killed himself. Something needs to be done, big-time, but no one is sure where to start.
I totally agree with you on this. It is not lame for a whole country to be sad over a tragedy of a child. Here in the USA we hear of those horrible stories more than I care to mention. At times I can’t even watch the news..or read the paper…I get emotionally attached to anything that talks about a child. I once lived in Germany for over 3 years and it was so different than here. I could ride my bike to the next town over or even two towns over without my parents worrying. That was 20 years ago. I was 15. I am sure things have changed, but I bet children could still ride their bikes without supervision. I often wonder what I will do as my two toddlers get older. Will I let them ride around our neighborhood unsupervised? I like to think I could, I see other kids from 5 on up doing so. I hope to me more relaxed when the time comes…I am a very protective parent because I am so afraid of what “could” happen. You are right…we do need to trust our children, but it the other crazy idiots that I don’t trust.
Maybe the over protected kids in those other countries like Latin America and here in the US become the rapists, murderers and psychopaths that cause chaos and havoc because they can’t cope on their own unless they are being overlorded and controlled themselves.
http://freerangekids.wordpress.com/2008/04/06/why-i-let-my-9-year-old-ride-the-subway-alone/
This reminded me of your blog. It makes sense. My parents never let me go anywhere alone and now I have a horrible sense of direction. I wonder if watching too much Law & Order on TV is warping the minds of criminals AND parents…