Second Child - A Wild Ride Through The Unknown
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May 28th, 2007
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If there's a baby on the way in the family, you're in for quite a ride. After (what I subjectively believe) successfully raising our 3 year old son, taking care of our now 9 month old daughter should be a piece of cake since I know exactly what to do. Right? Wrong! Amazingly, it turns out that our daughter has absolutely nothing in common with our son. They both breastfed well, have been very healthy, and love Baby Björn. Those are the only similarities I can find.Our 3 year old son has always been an angel. Before our daughter was born, we talked about how she would turn out. We both agreed that we could not possibly get as lucky again and that we would be "punished" for our gentle first child. That analysis turned out to be 100% correct.
Having two completely different kids is sometimes tough but it also adds excitement and a good perspective for the whole family. It all started at birth. My son took 38 hours, came out blue, and my wife required an operation. It took forever until my wife's body recovered. Annika's birth took 5 hours, my wife was out jogging within two months, and lost all her 45 lbs in less than six months without problems
You know how most children sleep the first few days after birth since they are exhausted? Not our daughter. She's been one high energy package from day one. Add some colic plus reflux for the first 5 months and you get one impatient little girl.
Our son has been constant smiles since the first month. Our daughter didn't even smile the first three months but is now a little less serious. Annika has been quick at getting to know her body. She was sitting at 4-5 months and is now walking. At 9 months. That's months head of our son. Her walking is actually more like running. She grabs one of our walking helpers with wheels on and runs through the house. Looks scary as hell but her balance is excellent. I'm telling you, she seems to be on a mission to learn as much as she possibly can. I can sense an urge in her to get on with things and explore everything around her. That's normal for a baby but her drive seems incredibly strong.
How impatient and hyper is Annika? When a father of twins tells us she seems like lots of work you know circumstances are extreme.
Over a year ago I talked about an article discussing how parents usually are too careful with introducing solid foods. We had planned on starting early this time around but were advised to wait until 7 months because of Annika's stomach problems. Our son has always been a good eater and loved the canned Swedish baby food. I must admit it's very tasty, mostly ecological, and the variety is simply amazing.
We started off with canned foods but were disappointed by Annika's lack of interest. She didn't want to eat much. By accident, we gave her some salmon one day at the table and she inhaled it. Turns out she loves real food but dislikes the baby food. Go figure. Salmon, chicken, pasta with sauces, yogurt, cheese, meat, rice, and halibut are some favorites. It's kind of weird to see your little daughter inhale half a fish file and ask for more. At first we were a little shocked but now love it since she can eat the same food as the rest of the family.
Our son started earning our trust early on. We child proofed the kitchen but moved nothing else. Flowers, photos, vases, sound system, DVD, computer, remote controls, and cell phones were left in their usual places. So far he has destroyed nothing. My daughter is already known as the "destroyer" and loves to beat the crap out of any object. We've already had to move things around, walking at 9 months is exciting but sure is tough on the parents.
I'm almost afraid to wonder where we will be in 6 months. And I almost feel sorry for the poor teenager that will one day take her out for a date. She will probably be a knockout, like her mother, but with that famous Latin temper. The great thing is that I will be with her 24/7 for the next 6 months or so. I have two more days of work and then I'm on paternity leave for at least 3 months but most likely rest of the year. Lets see if I can calm my daughter down a little and use some of those child whispering skills I'm know for.
Our kids are completely different but one thing we have noticed is the love between them. Annika is crazy about her older brother and starts breathing like an excited puppy when they play with each other. Daniel has been nothing but great to his little sister from the first day despite many times not getting much attention. There has been no kicking, screaming, or angry outbursts.
Out of all priorities in our children's life, being close friends and loving each other is probably at the top of our list. In case something happens to us parents, at lest the kids have each other.
AD,
Out of curiousity, how many “years” apart is Daniel and Annika? Are they 3 years apart or just 2 years apart? Do you sense some jealousy from Daniel or Annika between each other yet? Asking for family planning purposes LOL
Our first daughter was a dream. Slept through the night at 6 weeks, always happy, never cried at the doctor’s. Our pediatrician kept warning us, “This is NOT a normal baby. Don’t get too comfortable.”
When our second one was born and I was tearing my hair out over her UNRULY behavior, that same doctor said to me, laughing, “See? THIS is what a normal baby acts like!”
I can totally relate to what you’ve experience. Our first son was a dream when it came to things like putting him to bed, leaving him to play. He’s independent nature was a blessing for us.
Out comes son no. 2, and it’s a totally different ball game. He’s clingy and refuses to go to sleep without being patted. He’s 9 months old and controlled crying is a process we’ve only just begun implementing with him - 5 months later than when his brother started.
But when we see them playing and laughing at each other’s silliness, all the memories of late nights trying to get him to sleep goes out the window to be replace with feelings of joy and pride.
This is why we panic when we think about having a second child. Everything was so easy the first time (which is easy for me to say, since I wasn’t the pregnant one) and I’m worried the little someone we produce will be someone we’re not quite ready for. At least we knew that we didn’t know what we were doing the first time.
Then again, a friend for Cheeky to love would sure be nice for her…