Château Sibbel - By Invitation Only
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June 30th, 2006
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Our stay in Germany has been fantastic. As you know, going on vacation with children can be challenging sometimes. Daniel is always priority one when we travel. We try to schedule things that suit him best. If he's happy, we're happy. 
If we have a great vacation and he's miserable then it won't be a nice time. If Daniel has a great time and we have a so-so time it will be a good vacation anyway. What was so great about Germany? There were many things but the most important was the great reception we got from Heike, Robert, and their three boys Jan, Filip, and Richard. From now on their place is forever Château Sibbel. And I'm glad to report that Château Sibbel is one of the best places in the world for a family with children. Large house, huge garden, more toys than ToysRus, unbelievably well behaved and polite kids, and of course the great hosts Robert and Heike. Staying at the Four Seasons is definitely a step down.
I know Robert since many years but we had not spoken for over ten years. And a lot of things can change in such a long time. When Robert asked me to come and play in Germany he offered to let us stay in his house with his wife and three boys which sounded great. Actually, now when I look back, it could possibly have been two very long weeks but everything worked out extremely well. Spending two weeks with another family can be difficult and people tend get on each other nerves. Bringing four kids into the equation could also make it endlessly more complicated. What if the kids 
don't get along? What if Robert's and Heike's kids were hopelessly spoiled and just complained all day long? Or what if we had a nagging little two year old who didn't like other kids and was very picky with everything (like many others)? None of that happened and I can tell you with 100% certainty that Daniel had the best two weeks he's ever had in his short 28 month life. The weird thing is that I never even worried about the possible drawbacks and just automatically assumed everything would be great. I knew that Robert and Heike were nice but nothing about how they were as parents or if they had changed a lot. I'm usually a bit careful and skeptical about new situations but it must have been my instincts that unconsciously told me that everything would be fine.
Château Sibbel has a very nice setup with a large house and plenty of rooms. And a huge garden. Large enough to include a soccer field with goals and some playground equipment. It's not Versailles, but close. When you have four kids, and four adults, in a house it makes a huge difference if the kids can run around and get rid of all that extra energy. Soccer was played every day in the garden and Daniel also managed to find every single toy that had been discarded 
and stored in the garden shed. When I say toys I mean mostly cars. You can probably imagine how much great stuff a family accumulates with three boys, the oldest being almost ten. Bob the Builder, Playmobile, Märklin Train, Brio Train, and an incredible amount of general toys for boys. Daniel was in heaven. When we first arrived he was shy for about ten minutes but as soon as he saw the first toys the shyness disappeared. The very friendly reception from the boys also helped but I think he was a bit overwhelmed at first. You see, most of our friends here in Stockholm have girls so Daniel is not used to playing much with boys. And it's a huge difference.
Daniel is sleeping quite "late" nowadays so we were waking up around 07.30-08.30 every morning to an empty house. The kids were all in school already and Heike was just leaving for work. Breakfast was on the table which was a very nice touch. 
Petra, their maid, had everything under control and even ironed Sandra's clothes. Since that's the thing she hates most in the world, and won't do, she was very excited about having wrinkle-free pants. Lunch was cooked by Petra and we ate in early afternoon as soon as the kids got back from school. So Château Sibbel was "all inclusive" but of course we did try to help out with whatever we could. Dinner was usually outside at the Sibbel Patio Restaurant with some nice steaks or German bratwurst's on the grill. Last not least was the mandatory beers each night. After playing lots of tennis and playing with the kids it was great to kick back with few cold ones at night. The Germans do have some great beer and I can highly recommend the Moritz Fiege. If you want some early drinks and need to drive you can settle for the Radler, half Fanta and half beer, which is nice and refreshing. If you want real beer with good flavor but less calories then settle for the Leicht. And if you want good flavor and need lots of calories, like me, then you go for the Gruender Hell.
I like kids with good parents. That was true long before we had kids ourselves. What's a good parent you might ask? For me it's someone who have well behaved kids who can share their toys and be nice to others. 
The parents should be nice to their kids and not have to scream in order to get stuff done. Nice, calm, and relaxed. Basically an environment which is good and creative for children. And that's the exact Sibbel approach to raising a family. It just seems so easy and effortless. Things just get done without any fuss. The Sibbel University, as I call it, is indeed a great place for young children and will give them a nice start in life. The kids do lots of sports but also take care of their homework and take music lessons. A nice mix of different activities. The kids were all nice but Daniel's favorite was the oldest one, Jan. He's nine years old and became Daniel's mentor and best friend. Daniel talked about him from morning to night. He wanted to be with him all day long. Jan helped him down the tricky stairs, played soccer with him, shared all his toys, and made sure that everyone was nice to him. Like a big brother or perhaps even better than that. 
It was an amazing thing to see. I was a little surprised to be honest since I figured he would get bored by being with a small kid like Daniel a lot. Maybe he was but I can tell that he made a huge positive impression on our son. Many kids are spoiled and don't like to share their toys. Not so in this family. Daniel played with anything he saw and there were never any complaints from the children. First I thought that the kids were instructed to be extra nice with our son but it soon became apparent that was not the case. It's just how the kids are without being told anything. It was sooooo nice for Daniel and something we appreciated more than anything. That Daniel had a good time and was met with such hospitality meant a lot to us.
We didn't spend all day long at Château Sibbel although we could have. I practiced tennis a couple of hours each day at the 
club which was tiresome in the beginning and we also did many day trips. We visited the World Cup town's of Köln and Gelsenkirchen which was very nice. Great atmosphere and friendly people. We also stopped by the lovely little town Muenster. I lived here and played professional tennis during the summers for five years in the nineties and it was nice to once again walk around town. We also strolled around nearby Bochum and made a visit to their lovely little zoo with the Sibbel family. Overall it was one of the better vacations we've had in a long time.We tip our hat to the Sibbel family, including Robert's lovely parents, and their nice children for their hospitality.
Château Sibbel - By Invitation Only. I hope we get invited again.
Have a nice weekend!
Hi! World Cup city! Did you manage to catch any of the matches? Do write about them! Your friends have a really handsome bunch of boys! Oh, and the 8th picture, it’s to be Filip and Dan isn’t it? Got the ‘D’ and ‘J’ mixed up :) Made a lil’ error there!
Sounds like a great time! I love Köln…would love to go back some day. And with the Germany advancing in the World Cup I’ll bet there was a lot of excitement in the air. Most important, congrats on finding a good environment for the Daniel….that’s HUGE.
Thank you for opening a wonderfully new sight..I wish you the best of luck with your new venture.
Jul 6th, 2006 at 2:12 pm
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Jul 17th, 2006 at 9:54 am
[…] To kick it up a notch we moved from tri-lingual to quad-lingual during our two weeks in Germany. I speak pretty good German although I have forgotten some since I don't use the language much anymore. I've been focusing more on Spanish instead. But my German is still in the back of my head and it came back very quickly. Daniel is used to us speaking three languages at once but moving on to four is perhaps a bit of a stretch. We stayed with some very good friends during our recent visit and they have three young children who speak little English. So I was of course speaking German to the children. I would ask Daniel something in Swedish and Sandra would add something in Spanish. We would at the same time be chatting to each other in English and I would also be speaking to the German kids sitting next to Daniel in German. In the beginning, our son would look at me in a funny way as I spoke German. He would chuckle, laugh, and say "Pappa, Pappa….." the first day as to point out that I was acting strange. But it's simply amazing how quickly children adapt. After a day or so he was used to it. I wish I could still adapt at the same pace as my son! Daniel even picked up a few German words during our two week stay which sounded odd but very cute. It's completely normal for me to juggle three languages at once without thinking about it. I do it every day. At first, I kept thinking in Spanish when I tried to speak German but that quickly changed. I think it's great to force my brain to do some different things as I'm getting older and more set in my ways. But the reactions of the people around us in Germany was one of astonishment. They were impressed/scared/wanted to call children's services, especially the older ones, because we were using all these languages with our son. 99% of the people in Sweden speak excellent English and they are rarely surprised over someone using two languages with their children. They tend to react when we use three languages but are always supportive and point out how great that is for our son. The reactions in Germany tend to be more muted and it's not very common that a family uses several languages at once. Hardly surprising since the Germans are hopelessly conservative and at least ten years behind the rest of the world in many areas. When mentioning internet, email, credit cards, stores open on a Sunday, or a global economy the Germans get that puzzled look in their eyes. What, are you saying the world is not exactly the same as 30 years ago? Well, we don't care, we refuse to change! They are even worse than the Swedish at handling change. And that is very scary. […]
Jul 31st, 2006 at 4:37 pm
[…] I have no clear answer to why my friend is acting this way to her daughter. The weird thing is that this is her second child, she's divorced and also has a teenager that lives with her father, and I would expect a parent of a second child to have learned something the first time around. Do you ever make mistakes with your children? If you're anything like me, you do. I hate it when Sandra tells me of something stupid I did. I feel terrible but usually see the mistake quickly. I do try to learn and avoid further mistakes. This is where watching other parents is so helpful to me. I see some parent doing a stupid thing and I look back at my own actions and question myself? Do I do the same thing? Or if it's a great thing, I obviously tell myself I should do more of that. Like our recent trip to Germany where we stayed with my friend Robert and his family. He's got three kids who are a lot older than Daniel but were raised incredibly well. It was clear that I would like Daniel to be raised to be equally nice, kind, and generous when he grows older. I love to see good parenting. It's so uplifting and energizing. […]
Sep 7th, 2006 at 3:02 pm
[…] Posted on Thursday 7 September 2006 In the last few days I've been reading more about children and their education at a very young age. I discussed this here and here on The Blogfathers. Seems like the common approach today, especially in the U.S. is to go heavy on the homework and tests from the very beginning. Apparently parents believe their kids will become rocket scientists if they pile on the homework and decrease the playing at age 6. That's not the we do things here in Sweden and I'm very happy about that. For a toddler or first grader, fun and play is the focus and this continues into the teenage years. I guess all parents want their children to grow up with a good education and nice job at some point. But have you ever thought about what kind of occupation will suit your kids when they grow up? I think it's fascinating to see what kind of occupations my son is interested in right now and what gives him that sparkle in the eye and big smile on his face. Is that a good indication of what he will be interested in later in life? If so, my son won't need to go to school for very long, study hard, or do much homework. Below are Daniel's favorite jobs. They consistently bring him joy and he can't stop talking about them. And it gives me pleasure any time I can expose him to these occupations. 1. Dump truck driver - When Daniel hears the dump truck coming for it's 7.30 am morning route he runs to the balcony cheering loudly. Then he stands there until all the recyclable stuff has been collected. He even covers his ears to protect them from the noise. It's the cutest thing ever. Occasionally the dump-truck will run late and we'll catch it on our way to day care. That's the best thing that can ever happen, at least according to Daniel, and we must stay and see every single bottle being collected. 2. Police, Ambulance, or Fire Trucks - Pretty much anything that has flashing lights is extremely popular and belongs to the "wee-wee-wee" category as Daniel calls them. Wherever we go he spots them, way before I do. It's too bad for him that crime is very low here and there doesn't seem to be any fires either. Since he loves loud fire trucks flashing their lights, do I need to mention how much he loves New York City!!?:-)) 3. Trains - I guess the ultimate would be to be the actual driver but I think it would suit equally well to work with servicing trains or collect tickets. He loves trains! On the weekends we ride around on the train or subway for a couple of hours just because he enjoys it. We hang out near the tracks at the main Central Station and watch excitedly how the trains pull in and out. The other weekend we got to hop on the train and take a quick tour of the drivers area. Can you imagine how popular I was that day? 4. Bus Driver - A bus rides is sometimes added to the aimless weekend riding on the train. He loves to call the bus driver "senor" and must push the button for every single stop. Some kids seem unhappy riding the bus but Daniel can stay there for hours. 5. Boat Captain - We have a small ferry near our house which only shuttle people on a three minute ride across a small river. The boat driver is another "senor" and we regularly ask for permission to go up and see the captain while he driving the boat. The boat ride is thankfully quick otherwise I would have to quit my job and ride full time. When we want to go totally overboard we take the ferry and then bike to a nearby bridge which opens, like the ones in Ft. Lauderdale, to let through large boats. We stand right next to the bridge and see it open and if we're lucky a couple of trains will pass by while we're waiting. Talk about heaven! Tonight and Saturday I have something very special planned for our son. I'm guessing it will be something he will remember. Tonight we will be watching grown men play with miniature trains. There seem to be quite a few who loves to build and construct miniature railways, usually a copy of some particular station, and tonight we will be extending Daniel's bedtime and watching as Stockholm Association Of Miniature Trains run their huge collection of trains. I used to love trains as a toddler but my parents never bought me one of those railways I desperately wanted. Daniel has briefly watched miniature trains during our trip to Germany and was intrigued to say the least. Saturday morning we will be visiting Nirvana. I've called the local fire station and arranged to stop by there while they do their weekly service of the fire trucks. We did stop by there last week just to look at the trucks from far away and I almost had to drag Daniel into the car. Should be a couple of memorable hours. I can't tell you how much I love doing this things with our son. It brings me little pleasure personally but giving him this simple but powerful experiences is worth billions to me. It's obvious that many small boys have a period when they love trains/buses/police but I'm wondering when, if ever, it will come down to a more normal level? […]
Sep 22nd, 2006 at 7:56 pm
[…] My younger sister never was fortunate to travel the world and never had to learn to chit chat with others. She's still stuck where I was at 15 years when interacting with most other people. I guess she has a good life but it would be totally different if she felt more comfortable about herself and her abilities. Her kids are nice, well actually I don't really know because they never say a word. During our stay up north last summer we saw them for a few hours but they only managed a "Hello" and "Bye" They are still 12,9 and 7, or something like that, and I think there is lots of possibilities for improvement. A refreshing contrast would be our trip to Germany this summer and the stay with our friends at Chateau Sibbel. My friends Robert and Heike have managed to raise their three boys (9,8 and 5) exactly what every parent must aim for. Polite, outgoing, educated, and just incredibly nice. We had never met them, and they didn't even speak English, but they took such unbelievable care about Daniel during our two weeks that we were almost shocked. If my kids turn out that well I will be ecstatic. […]
Sep 25th, 2006 at 2:52 pm
[…] Up until two years and a few months Daniel mixed mostly Spanish and Swedish regardless of whom he was speaking to. He does very little English right now but that's no problem since that's the easiest language to learn. This summer something strange but cool thing happened when we spent two weeks in Germany playing tennis and seeing my friends at Château Sibbel. Since I speak pretty good German I used mostly that down there and this amused my son. He thought it was funny to hear his dad talk in this new funny language. My friends have three German boys aged 9,8 and 5 who speak nothing but German (a few word of English as well) and Daniel was hanging out with them many hours each day. We were actually going quad-lingual for a couple of weeks. I don't know if this triggered something in Daniels head but as soon as we got back to Sweden he started speaking to us in separate languages. Out of nowhere. Sometimes we mention to him that mom and dad are speaking in different languages but I feel it's a bit early to expect Daniel to understand what we mean. The great thing is that it came completely naturally. From one day to another he switched his vocabulary. It's so cute to see him speak Swedish to me and then answer Sandra in Spanish at the same time. […]
Apr 9th, 2007 at 4:35 am
eye wrinkle…
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Jun 24th, 2007 at 8:49 pm
[…] My German friend Robert, who's family has this year also graciously offered me Chateau Sibbel, has three great children and is surely doing what he can to keep the number of German children […]
Aug 7th, 2007 at 10:06 pm
[…] with me. It was a fantastic decision and I'm so happy I got to see my old friend Robert (Chateau Sibbel), his great family, my team mates, and all the members at the club. And I got to use my German […]